“Although this world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.”
— Helen Keller

“What have you been up to?! It seems like you’re living the dream by the look of your Instagram feed…” — a friend said to me this morning.
Also this morning, earlier: I called a dear friend from college and poured my heart out about some unpleasant feelings I’ve had lately.
The contrast between these two interactions is poignant: the imagery is real, and the joy is real, but so too is the emotional hardship of simply going through life as an adult, of putting ourselves in the arena and taking our hits.

Sometimes we can be happy, and sad, at the same time. It’s not a facade, it’s not a mask. Last Tuesday I watched a dolphin frolicking in the ocean at El Capitan State Beach, at sunrise. I felt a warmth of gratitude for the opportunity to have the experience; the circumstances of my life and work that allowed me to be there at the time.
But I also felt a tinge of loneliness, a longing for a tribe, and deeper, more meaningful relationships in my daily life. I think this feeling is more common than we usually want to acknowledge publicly.

I’ve had some hard times. Some of them have been recent, heartbreaking, and novel in their challenge.

The challenge of overcoming suffering might be more than just a roadblock in the pursuit of happiness; it might be the work of life itself. Or at least a significant part of it. We’re fortunate we get to do it, because it’s an adventure with rewards like any other.

Some things I’ve learned recently; not in order of importance:
— Love is a verb, an action to be practiced. Love is something to be given, not so much received. There are lots of ways to love; and none of them are transactional.
— Identifying (and naming) the root cause of my feelings is extremely beneficial. I’m seeing this revelation has profound implications.
— In conflict, anxiety serves the problem, not the solution.
— Peace serves the solution, not the problem
— I can’t be my best without a good night’s sleep.
— The Mood Meter app is pretty great. It helps name emotions (you’ve got to name it to tame it) and provides links and guidance to foster better emotional intelligence.